Page 52 - Poetry-Animals

The Tale of a Tailless Cat

Now all the wise men say, I ween,
That even a cat can look at a Queen
Yet the Lord High Chamberlain
Drove me away
From the palace door
Just the other day.
And all because a cruel boy
Who’d often leer at me and scoff
Crept on me while I lay asleep
And whacked my tail quite off.
“You’re a sight to be seen,” said the Chamberlain,
Then he kicked me out and said alack,
Get out, you freak, you’re a sight to be seen,
There’s nobody cares if you never come back.”
Ah, a thing like that
In this world has to be;
Ah, me, ‘twas indeed,
Quite a cat-as-trophy.
To the Lord Mucky Muck of the something or other
I went straightaway; he could not bother.
“I wish to bring my case ‘fore the law,”
I said with a plaintive wail.
“You might bring your case,” he said with a frown,
“I’m sure you can’t bring your tail.”
I bristled my fur and I humped up my back.
I went to the doctor and I said, “You’ve a knack
Of curing all things right up pretty pat—
For pity’s sake can’t you help an old cat.”
Said the doctor: “I heal a cough or a cold,
Make fat people slim or slim people fat;
Make wonderful cures, do all things, in fact,
Except fasten a tail to a bobtailed cat.”
Then some said that I should seek
A writer whose yarns brought him gold;
So the genius I found; he bade me sit down
And said he’d a tale unfold.
“Nay, nay, kind sir,” I squealed with joy.
“Don’t unfold the tale you see;
I’ve lost my own and I beg that you

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