Page 36 - Poetry-Family

House-Cleaning

Taking down the pictures,
Dusting off the wall—
“Not at home this morning
Should there be a call.”
Toast and eggs for breakfast—
Things turned upside down—
Wife and girl a-jawing—
Husband skips for town.
Taking up the carpets—
Tacks and dust for lunch—
Boy, for asking questions
Gets from me a punch.
Washing off the windows—
Doors all open—wide—
She with a pail and dust-pan
Used to be my bride.

No fire in the furnace—
Bell goes on the ring—
“Cleaning house to-day, m’m,
First day of the spring.”
Night! a doctor calling—
Wife done up in bed,
Husband scoots for drug store;
Clerk asks who is dead.
Night reporter’s item:
“Coroner had a ring
For a stiff found floating—
First one of the spring.
Verdict of the jury—
Foreman, sly old mouse—
“Suicide from torment,
Caused by cleaning house.”
—(Chicago Herald)

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