Page 74 - Poetry-Romance

But, oh, the irony of fate!
Upon its edge the coin stood straight!

And there, embedded in the sand,
John Henry let the dollar stand!

And he will tempt his fate no more,
But live and die a bachelor.

Thus, ladies, you have heard me sing
The ballad of John Henry King.

— Ellis Parker Butler (Century Magazine, 1897)

A Scientific Dilemma

DEAR LADY: My duties as head of the college,
Professor of science and general knowledge,
Metaphysics, including psychology
(Also including, perhaps, biology),
May try my lately recovered strength
Unless—but I’ll tell you the matter at length.

A couple of months or more ago
I was overworked, as perhaps you know.
My plans for the moment were quite upset;
The doctor ordered me off. We met.

You, of the kindest of hearts the possessor,
Wandered about with the grave professor;
Protesting that after the youth Byronic,
You found him a healthful mental tonic.

We chanced on a bench that a thoughtful mechanic
Had cut in a rock (which is plainly volcanic)

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